Straw Skimmer Hat Accessory

Description

Look, if you’re going to run away from home to become the captain of a riverboat casino, we’re not going to try and stop you! Sure…it sounds like kind of a weird dream, to want to spend the rest of your life on a riverboat. Didn’t those things use to sink all the time? And we gotta ask you…do you know how dirty the Mississippi River is? Don’t get us wrong, it’s a beautiful trip down that ribbon of water, but spending all of your time on it…you can’t even swim in it, did you know that? Or you can, but you shouldn’t. And especially not when you get even further down, because, y’know…the river carries all that pollution with it.What’s our point? Well, it just seems like being on a riverboat casino would put you in direct interaction with some shady characters – you know, people who like to gamble away all their money and then the money of other people. But we’re not going to stop you! We get it, you want some of that good ol-fashioned Mark Twain Americana adventure!To live that riverboat dream to it’s fullest we must advise that you bring this Straw Skimmer Hat with you. It will help protect your from the sun and give you that proper “I spend a lot of time traveling down the Mississippi River” look. It has an orange hue with a freshly woven texture. The brim wraps around your head, shading your eyes and making you look right at home on the water. Also, it will make it easier for the authorities to spot just where you fell into the water if some unhappy gambler tries to drown you. Happy river boating!